Three Things
by Lolly O'Neill
Summary: Harry gets a call in the middle of the night from an upset Hermione who was kicked out of her apartment by her ex-boyfriend. Harry decides to let Hermione stay with him until she finds a new place...but when the time comes, will he want her to leave? HHR
1. Chapter One

Three Things

By Lolly O'Neill

A/N: This is just a little idea that popped into my head one day when I couldn't seem to find any good fan fictions out there that I wanted to read. Hope you all enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything affiliated with Harry Potter. I am just a fan who is too impatient to wait for the sixth book and so forced to write my own HP stories. Besides, we all know that Harry and Co belong to The Great JK Rowling.

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**Chapter One**

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_Three Things that Greatly Irritate me_

_1) Evil._

_2) Evil people who act innocent, even though you know they're not. And they know that you know they're not. And you know that they know that you know they're not. And you can't do anything about it because you don't have any hard evidence to book them with._

_3) People who phone in the middle of the night to talk even though you've already explained that you're trying to sleep._

* * *

"Hello?" Harry said groggily, picking up the phone next to his bed. He squinted at his alarm clock and managed to make out that the time was 2:30 in the morning.

"Harry? Oh, Harry! I'm s-so sorry for c-calling you this late, but I r-r-really needed someone to talk to." At the sound of the over-emotional voice on the other end of the line, Harry immediately sat up, turned on his lamp and reached for his glasses.

"Hermione? Are you OK? What's the matter?" He asked, becoming more concerned for his friend as heard her start sobbing on the other end. "Hermione? Look, I'm coming over, OK?"

"No! No Harry. Can I come over to your place? Please?"

Not even wondering why she would rather come over to his place instead of him going over to hers, he said, "OK, I'll see you soon."

"OK. Thank you, Harry. I'll be there in a minute. Bye." Hermione replied and rang off.

As soon as he rang off on his end, he threw the covers off himself and dashed over to his closet where he found a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt and threw them on just in time to hear a popping sound come from his living room. He dashed out of his bedroom and into the living room where he beheld a side of Hermione that he had never seen before.

Hermione looked terrible. Her usual wavy brown hair was a matted mess, her pristine clothing was wrinkled, and her normally soft brown eyes were puffy and red from crying. The moment she saw him enter, she started sobbing again and fell to the floor – her usual confident self deteriorating before his very eyes. He ran to sit beside her and scooped her up into a hug where she sobbed against his chest for several minutes before calming down and Harry was able to speak.

"Do you want to talk about what ever it is that happened?" He asked gently, rubbing slow, soothing circles on her back to calm her.

"Shawn and I broke up." She whispered. "He said that he never loved me and that he wanted to be with someone who wasn't boring. Then the jack ass says that I have three days to move out of the apartment before he changes the lock and gives my stuff to charity." At this, Hermione began sobbing anew, soaking Harry's shirt more and more. "W-where am I going to live? I c-can't f-find a place in th-ree d-days."

Harry sat with her on the floor for ten more minutes silently fuming on his best friend's behalf. It was after those ten minutes had passed that Harry realized that Hermione had fallen asleep against him and that he had made a decision. He picked her up gently so as not to wake her and placed her on the couch where he covered her with a polar fleece blanket that was thrown over the chair to the left of the couch. With one last look, he crept out of the room and into the hallway where he opened the first door on the right instead of the first door on the left (his bedroom), turned on the light, whipped out his wand and settled in for a long night.

* * *

It was noon when Harry finally heard Hermione beginning to stir from her sleep. He walked out of the kitchen with two cups of coffee and handed her one as she sat up. He sat on the edge of the chair, watching her nurse the warm mug in her hands and take of sip of the bitter drink allowing it to wake her up a bit more before anything was said.

"Sorry for waking you up so early. I just didn't know who else to call." Hermione said in a slightly hoarse voice.

"Hey, it's no problem. Remember all those times at Grimmauld Place before going to school when I'd wake you up in the middle of the night to talk? What are friends for, eh?" Harry replied.

"I feel so … stupid. Like I should have known he really didn't love me and he thought I was boring." Hermione said dejectedly.

"Shawn is a jerk. And you're not boring and most certainly not stupid. You have to be the least stupid person that I know. I've always said that you're the smarted person that I've ever met. Why do you think I always run to you for advice instead of Ron? If I asked Ron anything his answer would probably be something like, 'maybe you should fix yourself something to eat. I can never think on an empty stomach.'" Harry said in a mock serious tone.

Hermione cracked a smile and gave a short chuckle before saying, "It's funny because it's so true. He really would say that."

"Are you kidding me? He has said that. Like I said, why do you think I always come to you?" Harry laughed. They laughed for several moments about all the goofy things their other best friend Ron Weasley had done in the past before they sobered up and the issue they had previously been discussing came back, although they both found it easier to talk about it than before.

"Come with me." Harry said suddenly when they got onto the issue of Hermione having no place to live now that her ex-boyfriend had kicked her out. He stood up and held out his hand to her to help her up, which she gladly took. She held onto his hand with a bemused expression on her face all the way to the hallway (which wasn't a long walk) and held the expression but released his hand when they stopped at the first door on the right. She gave him a curious look as he grinned and said, "Open it," and put her hand on the brass door knob. When she turned it and swung the door inwards, the sight that greeted her was one that she was not at all expecting.

The room somewhat spacious and had light green (one of her favourite colours) walls. There was a double sized bed in the middle of the room with a white duvet cover over it and two pillows in white shams with two green throw pillows on top. The door to the closet was mirrored, making the room look bigger than it was and there was a light coloured wood chest of drawers on the left wall near the closet. On he right wall was a desk made of the same wood with a chair pushed in. Across from the bed were a vanity and several empty bookshelves that were just begging to be filled. The best part of the room, in Hermione's point of view, was the bay window with a cushioned window seat that was covered in white and light green fabric to match the curtains.

Hermione turned to Harry, mouth opened slightly in surprise before she managed to gather herself and say, "Does this mean … what does this mean?"

"It means you can live with me." Harry said simply.

"But, I couldn't ask you to –"

"You don't have to." Harry shrugged. "Come on. Why don't you go take a shower and freshen up then we'll go over and get your stuff."

Hermione just nodded absently and let herself be led out of the room and towards the bathroom, fresh towel and bar of soap in hand.

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A/N: What did you think? Good? Bad? Brilliant? Horrendous? Please, your feedback would be greatly appreciated – especially constructive criticism. A note to anyone who has read my other stories – most notably The Hero Complex – this story, as you may have guessed from lack of updates, is on an indefinite hiatus. All the chapters for that story are stored on a crappy old computer that not only is not hooked up to the internet, is virus infected. So I can't upload. And I'm too busy (ahem-lazy-ahem) to re-write the chapters. Anyway, mates…until next time…

L. O'Neill


	2. Chapter Two

Three Things

By Lolly O'Neill

A/N: I am so sorry it took me so long to update; homework has really been a drag and I now have to go to math tutoring because I'm so far behind (I've also been sick). Anyway, I hope this chapter is OK. I realize that things are a little slow, but it'll definitely have picked up by chapters 4 and 5. I just have to bring back a few more characters in chapter 3 and then we're all set! A slight note on the rating – this story is rated "T" (not for Troll) because of slight language (I use the "A"-word and the "H"-word in this chapter). So if you feel offended by it, I am sorry. It is also rated as such for future chapters, just in case I get into "heavier" stuff (which I shouldn't because I'm not planning to), so it's just a precaution. Anyhoo, read on!

Disclaimer: I do not in any way own Harry Potter or claim to own Harry Potter. Doing so would be stupid because then I could be sued and people would call me idiotic because apparently everyone else would know that Harry and Co. belong to JK Rowling except for me.

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**Chapter Two**

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_Three Things that make me feel Awkward_

_1) When someone gawks at my scar, feels inclined to tell me my life story, or asks me to autograph their magazine, shopping bag, arm, cat, baby, etc. _

_2) When someone who has never met or seen me before (but has heard of me) says, "Oh, so _you're_ Harry Potter" then size me up. This is particularly uncomfortable when the person who does the "Once-Over" is an old woman or a man._

_3) When Ron asks me to hold Celia while he goes to grab a clean nappy for her because she pooped and it smells._

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Hermione's apartment is located on the fifth floor of a fifteen floor high-rise just outside of London. Harry could not say with great sincerity that he ever liked the location of it. It was ridiculously difficult to find if he drove and there were not any good apparition spots near to the building. However, with Hermione in the passenger seat beside him giving the directions and telling him which way to turn, Harry found the building quite easily and quickly pulled into the first available parking spot in the visitor lot.

"I can't go back there. I just –"

"Don't worry. We'll be in and out with your stuff faster than you can say 'Quiddich'. Besides, using magic to pack makes it go so much faster." Harry reassured her as he opened the building door with a quick and hidden _alohamora_. They walked across the foyer and stepped into the lift. Hermione pressed the number 5 and just as the doors were closing they heard someone shout "Wait!" Using reflexes born of Quiddich and Auror training, Harry jabbed the button to re-open the doors and an old woman with frazzled white hair flew into the lift car carrying about twelve shopping bags.

"Oh, oh, thank you dear! Phew! That's the most I've run in absolute ages!" the woman said as the doors shut and she pressed the number 6. She looked around her to see who was in the lift with her and gave a startled cry. "Hermione dear! How have you been? And who is this strapping young fellow?"

Hermione gave Harry an exasperated look before replying, "I'm fine Mrs. McCracken, thank you. This is my friend Harry. I told you about him when we had tea, remember?"

Mrs. McCracken gave Harry the "London Once Over" before saying to him, "You're a lot shorter than I would have imagined." She turned back to Hermione and said, "Dear, I meant to ask what all that yelling was about yesterday night. I could hear it straight though the floor!"

Hermione turned red at the comment before replying, "Oh, Shawn and I had a fight. Harry's here to help me pack up my things."

"You're moving out? Oh, that's horrible! Well, you must give me a ring one day so we can have tea. Where are you living now?" Mrs. McCracken gushed.

"She's living with me." Harry jumped in before Hermione answered.

"Really?" Mrs. McCracken said suspiciously, eyeing Harry up and down again. Before anyone could say anything else, the lift came to a stop and opened its doors with a ding, mercifully letting Hermione and Harry out of the confined space. "Well, I'll talk to you later dear! It was nice meeting you Harry!" Mrs. McCracken called as the doors began to shut. Harry and Hermione waved at her until the doors were all the way closed. When they did they both dropped their hands and their fake grins and turned to each other with exasperated looks on their faces.

"Who was that?" Harry asked.

"Mrs. McCracken. She lives above me. I first met her when she over flowed her bath tub and it leaked into our living room. I have tea with her sometimes because she lives by herself and has no one to talk to. She also liked to hear my stories about the magic world. Mind you, she thought I was just telling her a story that I made up for a book or something, but it was good to talk about the magic world with someone who doesn't know it exists." Hermione explained as they made their way down the hall. They finally reached the last unit and Hermione produced her key which she stuck in the hole and turned. The door opened and they stepped in. The apartment was eerily silent as they stepped into the living area.

"He's not here right now. His shift at the hospital doesn't end for another hour." Hermione said, explaining both the silence and the absence of her ex as she moved toward the hallway. They reached the room at the end and Hermione flicked on the light. The room was obviously hers; there were bookshelves all on one wall that were completely full and the room was painfully neat and well organized.

"OK. Well, you can start on the books, I guess. And I'll do the clothes." Hermione sighed as she surveyed the room. A pained look crossed her face as she shifted her shoulders uncomfortably.

"It's alright," Harry said, putting his hands on her shoulders and massaging them lightly. "We'll have this packed in no time at all. Remember, you're with a packing pro here. I've already moved four times because the press and evil people always manage to find me."

"Oh, now I _really_ want to come live you. _The press and evil people always manage to find me._ That's great Harry!" Hermione joked, turning to come face to face with him.

"Well, they always did find me before I brightened up and put a fidelius charm on my place. They can't find me now!" Harry spluttered indignantly.

"I was just kidding. Geeze, didn't they teach you how to have a sense of humour in those three years of Auror training?" Hermione laughed.

"Aurors do not have a sense of humour that they are aware of, Miss Granger." Harry said mock seriously. "What, did they teach you to have a sense of humour when you were practicing to be a healer?"

"Hey, laughter is the best cure for anything!" Hermione chuckled. "Now, what was that packing spell?"

"OK, first we need some boxes…" Harry said, looking around. Hermione rolled her eyes, pulled her wand out of her pocket and with a few complicated wand movements, conjured some boxes out of thin air. "Right," Harry said sheepishly. "Well, now we just need to _pack_!" He finished with a sweep of his wand like he saw Tonks do in the summer before his fifth year. All of Hermione's books flew out of the shelves and neatly into the boxes and her clothes came out of the closet and chest and folded themselves into the remaining ones. It was all done in about twenty seconds.

"Well done, Mr. Potter. I'm impressed. 5 points to Gryffindor!" Hermione applauded him.

"What did I tell you? I'm a packing pro."

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Ten minutes later, Harry and Hermione could be seen exiting the building, laughing their heads off. The boxes they had packed up were shrunk and in Hermione's coat pocket but they were both carrying two (with charms on them to make them feather light, of course) to keep up the appearance that they were moving Hermione out.

As they came to Harry's car, Harry finally managed to gasp out, "I can't believe you did that Hermione. That was priceless!"

"I know, right?"

"I mean, I can see something like that coming from Ginny, but you? Never!" Harry laughed, putting the final box in the boot of the car. As he did so, he heard someone yell, "Moving out, I see. Good riddance!" Feeling Hermione tense up beside him, he stood up straight, closed the boot and turned around to see Shawn MacKee, Hermione's ex-boyfriend, with his arm around some girl with blonde hair, blue eyes and big boobs. _This guy is a walking cliché_, Harry fleetingly thought before Hermione seemed to read his mind and voice his thoughts.

"My, my. Aren't you just a walking cliché? Honestly, I'm glad to move out. It's so hard to live with someone who doesn't have any intelligence. Although by the looks of things, you're going to be in my exact same place if you plan to live with _that._" Hermione said scathingly. "Come on Harry. Let's leave." With that, she turned around and got into the passenger seat of the car. Taking her lead, Harry shot one of his scariest and dangerous looks at Shawn, who shivered involuntarily, before opening the driver's side door and starting the engine.

As they started to drive away, Hermione looked back at the building and said, "I hope they like the surprise I left them." And there, in the window of the end apartment on the fifth floor was a big glowing banner of 'SHAWN MACKEE IS AN ASS'. "That permanent sticking charm worked well, don't you think?"

"It was perfect." Harry chucked.

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_Knock knock!_

"Come in!" Hermione called though her new bedroom door from her seat on the floor. She had books scattered all around her and she contemplated each silently, trying to decide how she wanted to order them on her new shelves. At her last apartment, she had them all alphabetized by subject, but she'd be damned if she couldn't find a new way of ordering them. As she heard the door open, she quickly decided that it could be dealt with later and turned to face Harry who was standing in her doorway with an amused expression on his face.

"You're such a bookworm." He sighed, shaking his head in amusement.

"Hey! I am not!"

"Uh huh. And how many books do you own? Five thousand?"

"No, just one hundred or so…"

"And you don't consider yourself a bookworm?"

"No! People just give me books as gifts…"

"Because they know you like books because you're a bookworm."

"Oh, shut up!" Hermione laughed, throwing _Hogwarts, a History_ at him.

Harry caught it deftly and stared at the cover. "You still have this book? Remember when Ron and I always gave you a hard time for having it memorized?" Harry laughed softly before crossing the room to sit next to her in the pile of books. He handed it back to her. "This reminds me, I'm having dinner at Ron and Luna's tonight. Do you want to come with me? Ron and I were talking last week at the ministry when we were on lunch and he mentioned that he hasn't seen you in a while. What do you say?"

"Yeah, sure. Just give him a ring to let them know I'm coming. I saw Luna out shopping a couple days ago and she looked a little stressed out." Hermione replied, sighing down at her scattered books.

Harry got up and head towards the door, but turned around and stuck his head around the frame before leaving, saying, "Put them alphabetically backwards, and starting with 'Z'. That way you're notbeing Alphabetically Prejudice."

Hermione sat in silence for a few moments after he left before yelling, "What the hell is Alphabetical Prejudice?" Her only reply was a bark of laughter.

* * *

"Ron? Hello? Are you home?" Harry called from the front hall of Ron and Luna Weasley's house where he and Hermione had just apparated in.

"We're in the back!" came the reply from somewhere at the end of the hall.

"Come on," Harry said, leading Hermione towards the kitchen where there was a walk out to the back yard. As they neared, the smell of hamburgers cooking on the grill wafted though, making their mouths water hungrily. "Ron makes a mean cheese burger." Harry informed Hermione as he opened the screen door and let her though first.

"Damn right I do." Ron said, having heard Harry's comment. He turned around to face them, grinning insanely.

"Ron! Don't use that language around Celia!" Luna said from her seat under the patio umbrella. Sitting on her lap was a little strawberry blonde girl, who was clapping her hands and squealing, "Unca Hree! Unca Hree!" She squirmed her way off her mother's lap, crawled over to Harry and attached herself to his leg and letting out a final squeal of "Unca Hree!" Harry grinned and picked her up.

"And how are you today, Celia Bo-belia?" He asked her, tickling her stomach. She laughed and then grabbed his glasses and tossed them to the ground. This made her laugh harder. "Oh, unfair!" Harry said in mock indignation. "I'll just have to…" and he blew a soft raspberry on her cheek, making her laugh all over again. Harry then handed Celia back to Luna and took his glasses from Hermione who had picked them up for him.

"So, how are you guys doing? Anything new?" Harry asked as he led Hermione over to a chair at the table and pulled it out for her. He took the seat next to her.

"Nothing really. Work's been really busy with the Quiddich World Cup coming up soon, and Nimbus just came out with a new broom that's made just for beaters and we have to test it as soon as possible because England and Spain just ordered them and they want them in time for the tournament." Ron answered. Ron worked for the Magical Games and Sports department at the Ministry of Magic, just under the department head, Garry Ladner, so it was his responsibility to delegate to other staff members whatever Ladner said. Ron called himself "Ladner's Lackey".

"How's work at the Quibbler, Luna?" Harry asked next, turning to the blonde haired woman.

A rather dreamy expression floated across Luna's face for a second before she said, "Excellent. Sales have gone up after that story about the Griffolds came out. Dolly even got a picture of it and they're so hard to see because they're invisible."

No one batted an eye at that statement, although it made absolutely no sense. They were too used it. After all, that was Luna for you.

"So, Hermione, what have you been up to? We haven't seen you in a while. How's what's-his-face? Umm…Steve, Shane, Stanford…"

"His name's Shawn. And we broke up. I moved out this morning." Hermione answered, looking rather uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry, Herms." Luna said. Hermione grimaced at the nickname but decided to ignore it.

"It's OK. He was jerk. I've moved in with Harry until I can find a place of my own. Anyway, the reason I haven't been around much is because I've been working pretty much non-stop at St. Mungo's. You can't imagine how many spell related accidents wizards manage to get themselves into. The other day I had a man come in because he transfigured his nose into an elephant trunk." The group laughed. "Yesterday and today are the first few days I've had off in a while. I have the rest of this week off, thankfully, so I can catch up on my reading." She finished.

The rest of the evening went by pleasantly and it turned out that Ron did indeed make a very good cheese burger for someone who had very limited knowledge about food except how to eat it. At eight o'clock, Celia was put to bed and Harry agreed that he would read her a story before she went to sleep but ended up reading her the same one several times as she kept saying, "Ag'n" until she fell asleep on Harry, who laid her gently in her crib. It was after midnight when Harry and Hermione left Ron and Luna's place, tired after a night of catching up and reliving old memories.

"I am so tired. I think I could sleep until noon tomorrow." Hermione yawned as her and Harry made their way into the apartment.

"Same. Although the latest I can sleep in now is seven in the morning." Harry said as he hung his keys up on a hook. "Stupid Auror training has me waking up at four every morning otherwise."

"That sucks."

"Yup."

"Well, I'm off to bed. Good night, Harry." Hermione said, going into her room.

"Good night, Hermione." Harry replied, going into his room where he fell heavily onto his bed. He somehow managed to take his glasses off as well as his clothes so that he was just wearing his boxers and crawled under his blanket before falling fast asleep.

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A/N: Please tell me what you think! I'd like to thank all those who R&R-ed, not just R-ed (although I suppose I should thank those people too who just read, but I don't know who they are). The people who R&R-ed are:

**EmotionlessNightmare**

**Razz-Mi-Tazz** (Your screen name is AWESOME! I hope this answered some of your questions. I realize that I didn't mention their age yet, but I think you can imagine how old they are. The definite age is in the next chapter.)

**Sirius Black Here**

**ScribbleDream**

**StarFariey**

**CuterPuppy**

**hollyg20 **

**SilverG21**

**Final Fight**

**shion20**

**HHR4eva**

You guys ROCK! See ya on the flipside, home fries!

L.O'Neill


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